Stance is a way in which we can hold ourselves mentally, spiritually, emotionally and physically in regards to, in consideration of or in response to people, events or experiences.  

Stance can be especially useful if you’re the kind of person that’s easily overwhelmed by people or things going on, or if you’re sensitive to what other people say or do which may or may not have anything to do with you. 

My understanding or definition of stance:

Personal posture. 

Intellectual or emotional attitude in response to something or someone. 

A way of thinking about something. 

An opinion about something.

An automatic response to people, their feelings and behaviors.

Stance is about honest and authentic dominion.  

Feeling grounded, steady or confident in your stance-  in yourself, who you are and how you are the world – is a very powerful experience. 

Here are some of my favorite questions to help you understand what stance you’re assuming consciously and unconsciously, and how to step into a more defined, grounded and steady you. 

The best way to do this exercise is to bring to mind a situation or experience where you’d like to feel more empowered or confident. 

Now, journal the answers to these questions: 

What internal stance are you taking in regards to the situation or experience where you’re not feeling confident or steady? 

Where are you holding back and why? 

What good comes to someone holding back like this?

What are you protecting by doing so (by holding back)?

What stance would be most useful for you now?

What does that look like, feel like and sound like specifically?

Having a lot more insight around the topic, what would you like now?

What will having that do for you?

What is there to love or be grateful for in regards to stance?

Ashley Paquin
November 12, 2022